Sunday, October 7, 2007

October 7, 2004 ~ Remembering

I had planned on posting about our weekend tonight but instead am having a rough time. It hit me today in the middle of church that this is the date we lost Rose. Everything came flooding back to me all at once. You'd think that since it's been 3 years now I wouldn't hurt so badly. But it does hurt. There will always be a hole in our family where my baby should be. My arms always longing to hold her just once.

I have been wondering all week why whenever I saw October 7th in print or heard someone mention it I felt like I was forgetting something. Missing something. But instead of figuring out why I shoved the feelings aside. Now I know. Giving myself permission to remember.

Yesterday I found this beautiful angel figurine at a yard sale and at first glance I knew I had to have it. It was there waiting for me. You see, every year I buy an angel in memory of our little Rose Marie. Usually it's at Christmastime but this one showed up without me seeking it out. It's hard to say why it struck me but I knew this was the one. So I bought it early this year. Maybe it was God's way of giving me something special to hold this weekend letting me know He hasn't forgotten her either. In fact, she's with Him right now waiting for me & her Daddy. I love you Baby Girl. Please don't worry. We haven't forgotten. You have a special place in my heart forever & always.

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